Further Book Matters (and a curse)

Does it betray some weird psycho-sexual dysfunction (phallic insecurity, perhaps?) that my first reaction upon receiving the huge box containing my author copies of Fall of Thanes was to pile them all up into a tower and take a photo of it? Probably not, though I wouldn’t dismiss the possibility entirely. Behold my mighty book tower! See how it … towers.

Clearly, since these have shown up on my doorstep – and looking very fine at that – publication of the third and final part of the trilogy is now unavoidable. Early May, in a shop near you (or online if there’re no shops near you, of course). For those thinking of putting in an order, a reminder: should you be tempted by the thought of a signed, dedicated etc copy of Fall of Thanes all of your own, the place to go is the Transreal website. Click on my name at top right for all the details, but the most important point is that it’ll only cost you cover price plus shipping. Bargain!

While on the subject of books, I have been rectifying a shocking gap in my genre reading. Until this last week or two, my sole experience of Conan the barbarian was the long ago and rather dubious movies featuring a certain US politician in the title role. Now, I’m pleased to say, I’m making up for lost time by working my way through this gorgeous book – close to a thousand pages of pulpy, politically incorrect sword and sorcery merriment. I’m enjoying it considerably more than I thought I might, and for all the lack of ‘polish’ that occasionally crops up in the writing (these stories were being turned out incredibly quickly, after all), I’ve been struck by what an effective writer Robert E. Howard really is. There’s some seriously vivid and atmospheric work going on, alongside all the vigourous hewing and hacking and thumping. Great fun. How come I never read this stuff before? Idiot.

And finally, to the person or persons responsible for ms antispyware 2009, I have only this to say: may your toenails shrivel and crack, and turn yellow and crusty and stinky, flaking off into your socks bit by bit until they are all gone, leaving only a suppurating blisters where once they lay. And if your stupid little malware gets on my PC again, I hope the suppuration spreads up your legs until it reaches areas more vital than toes. So there.

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